[Video] Are Your Kids Planning to Put You in a Home?

There are a few realities we’re all facing today that simply weren’t an issue just a generation or two ago. 

First, people are living longer. Thanks to modern medicine and a variety of other factors, we are celebrating milestone birthdays of 75, 80, 90, and even 100 plus. 

Next, for most of us, the homes we’re living in weren’t designed to support us into old age. 

And lastly, families are busier, more stressed, and more disconnected than ever before in history. This means less communication, and a lack of communication means uncertainty. With uncertainty comes anxiety, and unchecked anxiety eventually creates panic. 

It might surprise you to know that if you have kids in their 40’s, 50’s, or older, they are likely having conversations with their friends regarding which retirement community they should move you into when “it’s time.” In fact, they are probably talking about you and your issues more than they are talking about their own kids, their jobs, or their hobbies. 

Here are the top 3 things your kids worry about most. Are you ready? 

    1. A health crisis or fall.

If something happens and you can’t manage on your own, how will they find the time and resources to help you out? This is especially true if they don’t live locally.

    2. Managing your home and affairs.

Taking care of one household is a lot for most people these days. Now your kids are imagining how they will be able to deal with managing two at the same time.

    3. Your stuff.

Oh my Lordy, the stuff. Every person I talk to says, Mom and Dad have so much stuff, and I have no idea how I am going to deal with it if something happens to them. They are overwhelmed just thinking about it. 

So, how can you put your kids minds at ease, and thereby hopefully avoiding their feeling compelled to start looking into retirement community options on your behalf? 

Create a plan. Be realistic and consider possible what-if scenarios. What should be in that plan? 

Here are 3 things to get you started:

• Where do you intend to live? Do you plan to stay put, or are you thinking you would like to move to a smaller place? Or is the thought of living in a retirement community appealing to you at some point? What is your specific plan for when and how that might happen?
  
  
• What’s your plan for staying put? If your plan is to stay put, think through the adaptations you will need to make and when (sooner is better than later). Are you going to remodel? Add grab bars? Widen doorways? Put in a ramp? Who do you have lined up to do this?
  
  
• Complete or update your estate planning documents and end of life plan. Hire an attorney to draw up your powers of attorney, living will, and other documents that ensure your wishes can be followed by those you elect as your advocates. Communicate your plan with key people who will be involved in executing that plan now or later.
  

If your kids KNOW and FEEL CONFIDENT that you have thought this all through and that you have a plan in place, they are far less likely to feel compelled to plan on their own without you. 

Furthermore, your kids may not like your plan, but having one is more important.  You certainly don’t have to get their seal of approval, but you will score a lot of points by having the plan in place.

 Just acknowledging you are getting older and that you might possibly need some support at some point, along with some pre-planning and instructions for them on what that might look like, can do wonders for relieving anxiety and creating peace of mind – both for you and for them. 

Look, I know you may be thinking to yourself that it’s none of your kids’ business where you live or how you live, but the fact is, any of us who live a long life are going to need support. You may not need it now and that’s great. So now is the time to think 5, 10, 15 years down the road. 

As you know, our team here at Buckelew Realty Group have regular seminars called the Senior Living Truth Series. It’s all about educating, equipping, and empowering mature adults and longtime homeowners to make informed decisions and stay in charge of their lives – no matter their age or circumstances.

Learn more at www.seniorlivingtruthseries.com or by calling 405-563-7501.

Naturally, if you have more questions about your home’s value, the current market, or anything else…just give our team of Certified Senior Housing Professionals a call at
405-708-7010 . We look forward to being of service!